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When Love Accepts

Is there any perfect person out there? Nah! Of course not! we all come with something and are constantly being molded into something better. The Lord is developing all of us and works with us right where we are. What a blessing it is to be accepted right where you are, how you are - flaws and all. When Love Shows Up, Love Accepts. 


Love doesn’t try to change you but rather pushes you to be your best self. Love admires your quirks and finds humor in your ratchetness (yeah you got some ratchet!). Love may not like everything you do or say but it accepts it and offers a kind, ‘bless your heart’ declaration and scurries on about the day. Love takes hold of your deepest flaws and secrets and handles them with extreme care and of course - love.  
Love’s acceptance causes you to feel secure, safe and empowered as if you can jump the largest hurdle in one leap!  When love accepts, you can be your true, authentic self, flowing in your best rhythm. 
1 Corinthians 13:7 (NCV) -Love patiently accepts…

Convenience Ain’t Free!

A few weekends ago I was blessed with a ticket to see the production ‘Jesus’ at Sight and Sound in Pennsylvania. What an awesome production it was and the set changes were amazing! After the play my group traveled over to the Shady Maple (I think that’s the name) buffet. The buffet choices were endless. At the grill station there was steak, salmon and blackened catfish. The catfish was outstanding! The line at the grill station was long because they were cooking everything on site. As I ventured over to the line to get me a piece of (ok another piece of) catfish, I started to turn around because the line was just too long and I did not want to wait! My cousin happened to be at the front of the line so I asked him to get my fish for me. Right in that moment I made eye contact with my Pastor and he looked like “no she’s not jumping this line”. I felt bad for a split second but not bad enough to recant my request for the catfish. But it did make me think further about how people do not l…

What to Do While You Wait

Waiting is hard to do. We like things to be instant. For instance, we like instant oatmeal, instant deposits, and even instant coffee! We like ready-made, pre-cooked and instant meals. This pre-occupation with ‘instant’ carries over into the area of relationships - and this can be dangerous. In relationships and dating the 'instant craving' causes anxiety which in turn causes us to get antsy during the wait. I completely understand this feeling as a seasoned single. I know how anxiety can sit in as the wait prolongs, sits and festers. So how do we calm down? What do we do while we wait? 
Let’s take our cue from the exceptional waiter in an exceptional restaurant. I’m talking about the best waiter you ever encountered, the one that made you tip extra at the end of the meal! Here are three things waiters do that we can apply during our season of waiting: 


1. Waiters Serve - Just like waiters serve the people at the table so should we serve Christ by serving God’s people. Participa…

Be Clear!

I know you all have written out that infamous list! You know, the man list!! Lord, I want him to be tall, dark, handsome and a host of other stuff that people come up with. Let me pause here and say that I’m not actually a fan of the list as I believe it closes you off to other possibilities that you may not realize you need however, if you must have a list please add this one to it: Clear! Clear what? Skin? Speech? No ladies - Clear Direction!! 


He needs to be clear on his purpose, passion and path in order to have the capacity to love and care for you properly. He must be clear on his purpose, that thing that God designed him to do. When asked the age-old question, “Why am I here?”, a man clear on his purpose will be able to articulate a clear answer. Keep in mind that purpose evolves over time and that’s okay. The important thing here is that he be in tune with the Holy Spirit and open to new directions that God may be leading him into. So I suppose that means a purpose-filled man i…

There is Life After This and That

So I’ve been participating in this ‘Pray for Your Future Spouse” challenge online. This is not something new to me as I’ve been doing this for some years now but I do believe there is power in numbers! What a beautiful thing that there are over 60,000 people participating in this challenge and prayers are going up each morning!! The challenge is sponsored by a Pastor and his wife out of Chicago (Pastor Jamal & Natasha) and they have been bringing on different people each evening for the daily teaching. Last evening a Pastor & Wife team out of Atlanta led the teaching on ‘purpose’ and how this must be established before entering marriage. At some point during this teaching, Pastor Pittman said, “God don’t waste hurts!” It was at that moment that the Lord spoke to me and told me ‘there is life after “this” and “that”!


Girrrl, I don’t know what your ‘this’ or ‘that’ is but know that it didn’t come to destroy you but rather God is using it as a catalyst for ministry! We’ve all crie…

When Love Shows Up

Some 'single girl’ cliches have come to fruition in my life recently, ones that I would clinch my pearls when I actually let them come out of my mouth or roll from my fingertips onto my laptop. You know those ones that singles cringe when they hear them because it sounds so condescending and quite frankly, annoying. Ok so where should my top 5 list start:  He’ll come along when you least expect itHe’s probably staring you in your face and you just don’t know it yetGod is just waiting to give you someone really specialSingleness is a gift (I say this one and I know it’s true but still super annoying!)God will bring him at the right time
Although these cliches are incredibly annoying, I can see them manifesting in my life! God definitely seems to be moving when I least expected it! As is the focus of this blog, empowering Christian women to be their absolute best, I’ve been working on creating the best version of myself. The thing is, I’m not there yet. I’m not at the place where I’d …

Who's The Boss?

In the midst of my inspirational training, I heard the presenter say, “You are the boss of your feelings, not the other way around”. Whet what? You mean to tell me all this time I was actually the one in charge? I could control my own feelings and not let them control me? Why yes! You are the boss of how you feel but then that leads to the question, what is the root cause of your feelings? One word: ingestion. 


By its most common definition ingestion is the process of taking food, drink, or another substance into the body by swallowing or absorbing it. It could also mean the process of absorbing information. What I’m suggesting here is that your feelings are usually directly tied to what you are ingesting or taking in. 
Anybody have a friend, co-worker or even family member that literally zaps the life out of you with their negativity? As soon as you see them, they begin to be negative, complain, gossip, or whatever else and the next thing you know, you’re feeling down or tired with no …

Girrrl Court Yourself!

July Theme: Wed Yourself "The Courtship"
I love courtship and the whole process of making a commitment to someone and taking the time necessary to truly get to know them. Courtship is loosely defined as a period during which a couple develops a romantic relationship, especially with a view toward marriage. One of the main differences between dating and courtship is dating tries to answer the question, How can I find the one who will make me happy? Courtship strives to answer the question, How can I honor God and discern His direction regarding my life partner?
So how does this all correlate to you? How can you court yourself? By answering the question above: How can I honor God and discern His direction regarding my life? (minus one word). Girrrl court yourself!


Here are three ways you can begin to court yourself:
1. Ask yourself from tough questions - Courtship involves asking some tough, reflective questions. Are you settled on your life purpose? If so, are you on track with yo…

Release Dat!

Well it’s the last day of May and the last of our series: It’s Renewal Season! If you’re going to be renewed this season you’ve got to learn how to release some stuff so that God can revive, refresh, and restore your spirit! 

Photo Cred: Nigel Morgan

Sometimes we walk around with stuff that God didn’t intend for us to carry. We keep things bottled in that if someone just taps us we might explode. So my word to end this series is simple today: Girrrl Release Dat! 
-So what you’ve made some mistakes in your past - God has forgiven you and moved on and now it’s time for you to ‘Release Dat’! 
-You keep making excuses about what you can’t do based on some lie you tell yourself:  Ex: I can’t start this business because I’m not business savvy, I wouldn’t know where to begin
LIES! - You are indeed business savvy, you don’t make it 20+, 25+,35+, 40+ years in life not knowing anything. ‘Release Dat’!  
-You’re still hurt by that family member or friend who wronged you. Your anger keeps you up at nigh…

Prepaid: An Inspirational Moment

**REPOST - I ran across this older post I wrote some time ago but it did indeed bless me today - I hope it blesses you too**
My younger cousin has a Boost Mobile cell phone. This company has built its brand on being a prepaid cell service provider. This means you prepay for your minutes each month and when the next month comes, if you don’t pay, it is okay you just won’t have any minutes to use. No contracts, no hassle I suppose but the best part is you never owe a bill. I’m sure Boost does not have a collections department because everything is prepaid!


When I think of this concept my mind begins to wander to Christ and how he prepaid the price for our sinful natures. There’s a popular Christian cliché that simply says “Jesus Paid it All”. The word ‘paid’ is a verb; it is the past participle of the word ‘pay’ which denotes that ‘paid’ is an action that has already taken place. Just as my cousin pays her Boost Mobile bill so she’ll have minutes to use, Jesus Paid It All way back on Calv…

God of the Turn Around!!

Girrrl stop worrying and let your mind and spirit be renewed knowing this: God is the God of the turn around! (I’ll pause….while you shout!)

God specializes in turning things around! Trust me, I’m not telling what I heard but what I know! He has a special knack for putting His hands on the situation and making it work out for your good - oh yeah, He said that in His Word - “And we know all things work together for good to those who love God, to those who are called according to His purpose” (Romans 8:28). God can turn around your self-esteem, your depression, your finances, your motives, your heart and even the heart of others - He will make your enemy your footstool! There’s no limit to the depths God will go for His children so Girrrl - stop worrying! 
Worrying does not fuel your spirit rather, it completely deflates it. It gets you no where but headed to your freezer to kill a half of gallon of Breyers cookies and cream ice cream (so I’ve heard….) and now you holding together your su…

Girrrl Celebrate It!

Hey Girrrl Stop Nation! I know y'all out there making goals and stuff (#goaldiggers) but as we are focusing on renewal in the month of May I want to encourage you to celebrate the small wins! 


Every large goal requires smaller goals in order to reach them. You know you could say, “Lord, my goal is to not cuss folks out anymore” and then lo and behold Sister Lulabell at the church bring some craziness to you and you get to cussin’! But this time you only went ham for 30 seconds as opposed to your normal 15 minutes!! Well celebrate that - it’s an accomplishment! 
I’m a new believer in celebrating small wins because it gives that dose of encouragement you need to stay in the race and keep going! For every small win you know you’re that much closer to the main goal!  
-You may not have reached your 25 pound weight loss goal yet but you’re going to the gym 3-4 times a week on a regular basis - celebrate it! 
-You may not have paid off that credit card yet but you are now sticking to a budg…

Just Say No!

Girrrl it’s springtime which means a time to get renewed, refreshed and rejuvenated! Here in the northeast I think Summer may have kidnapped Spring (cuz it’s hot and I’m having to run my air already!) but nevertheless it’s that time of year to focus on you and renew your spirit! In the month of May I’ll be giving you some suggestions for renewal that will surely jumpstart you into a refreshing! If you’re already doing the suggested things then pass it on to another sister in Christ - don’t be stingy!! 
Saying yes to things that don’t fuel your spirit is a sure-fire way to be perpetually drained! Saying yes to things you do not want to do will leave you depleted. You know you didn’t want to chair that program but you said yes anyway! Girrrl you know, you didn’t feel like going to dinner for the 3rd night this week but you went anyway (and then you side-eyeing folks all the way through dessert!) This is not how God wants us to be: drained and depleted - I mean even He rested! 
When they a…

Catch A Case!

Hey Girrrl Stop Nation!! It’s been a little while since I’ve posted but hey that’s life! I hope all has been well and that you're taking time to enjoy the journey! A journey, something we're all on but we're all at different phases. Some may be in the ‘Harvest’ phase of the journey, that place where you are reaping those good seeds sown! Some others may be in the ’Spanx’ phase of the journey, that place where you're being squeezed, stretched, and constricted beyond what you would prefer! Some of us are in what I refer to as the ‘Metamorphosis’ phase, the place where you're in a state of becoming something totally new, better and beautiful. It's in this phase that we enter into what is known as "Protection Season"! Protection from what? Hurt? Heartbreak? Emotional damage? Toxic behavior? Poor treatment from others and ourselves? Well, yes you should do your best to protect yourself from all of these things because all of these things can have an impact…