Check out Part 2 of the video Consistency. Here I explore a little about what God says about this subject. Actions do speak louder than words!!! Watch what people do!
Monday, June 24, 2019
Consistency is important in dating when trying to form and cultivate long-lasting relationships. It's vital to whether the relationship lives or dies. Inconsistent behavior is indeed a red flag and should be addressed as soon as you see it. If no corrective action takes place - deuces!!!
Check out the latest video blog post on this topic!
Tuesday, April 9, 2019
Negative thoughts, we all have them from time to time. Sometimes they come in quickly like an express train that is 10 minutes delayed and other times they linger like Baptist church people after service is over. They are the thoughts that can speak to the core of your soul and make it difficult to discern the truth from the lies. Negative thoughts like: I’m not good enough or I’m too much of this or too much of that. Whatever the thoughts may be for you, you can get past them.
One thing about a negative thought is that they rarely show up out of nowhere but rather they been planted some time ago and over time, they’ve been watered by life’s experiences and our beliefs about ourselves. We can almost look at them as seeds that have been planted in our psyche over time, buried beneath and then they grow. I equate negative thoughts to squatters. You know squatters right? The people who take up residence in a property they don’t own.
Shortly after my father passed away we were left with the task of cleaning out a property that he owned. There were people living in there paying rent to one woman who was living in the house also. She was collecting rent and pocketing cash on a property she didn’t own (yeah Baltimore off da chain!). Long story short, we asked her to leave and she refused. We called the police and much to my surprise they sided with her! We had to go through the courts because apparently squatters have rights! I’ll never forget the day we came to the house when they were actually evicted. Even with the notice on the door they still didn’t believe they were about to be evicted. When we arrived with law enforcement deez fools were cooking breakfast – I can remember the stench of the pork bacon frying on the stove; I didn’t eat bacon for like 3 months after that! The whole ordeal was a complete hot mess!
Just like this woman became a squatter in my father’s property, negative thoughts can squat in our minds, hearts, and spirit. They linger there, hangout, cook up bad smelling breakfast and fully take up residence in a property they don’t own! Glory be to God that the eviction process is not that extensive for the believer and the ‘negative thought squatters’ don’t have rights! The God we serve is the property owner, the law enforcement, the judge and the jury and He can evict them for good! Just hand those thoughts over to Him – relinquish control!
How? Fill your mind with God’s Word! Light and dark can’t co-exists, when light moves in darkness has to exit stage left! God talks about the mind a lot because He knows that it is one of the main weapons in the enemy’s arsenal: to attack the mind. Whether it is to send discouragement, depression, or low self-esteem our way, all of these things start in our minds. That’s why God says to “let this mind be in you which was also in Christ Jesus’ (Phil 2:5) because He knows that’s where the spiritual warfare takes place. So as it relates to the mind focus on these three things:
- Allow the peace of God to overtake you for a guarded mind in God – Phil 4:6-7, stay in prayer and let your mind and heart be filled with God’s peace. Satan sends distractions and disruptions that cause us anxiety in our minds and spirits. Allow yourself to be filled with God’s peace which will guard your mind from negative thought squatters!
- Allow yourself to be a living sacrifice for a renewed mind in God – Romans 12:2, keep God’s Word and His Ways front and center in your life. This is the only way to be transformed! Allow God to saturate you so that you can be renewed in Him. Negative thoughts can’t squat in a renewed mind, they may come to visit but they will quickly leave because the environment is not conducive for their lifestyle!
- Allow yourself to meditate on God’s Word for a refreshed mind in God – Phil 4:8, you have to make the conscious decision to meditate/think on things that are true, noble, just, pure, lovely and of good report because this is what will keep the negative thought squatters from taking up residence. Get rid of the “stinkin’ thinkin’”!
Begin to think differently, this will in turn enable you to move differently. Allow God to evict the negative thought squatters so that you can operate fully in Him!
Thursday, March 21, 2019
Clearly I love inspirational posts – that’s what you get when you visit Girrrl Stop at any of the social media sites (i.e. FB, da gram, & tweetz!); you get inspired! Whether it is a scripture or some sassy, cute quote, I always aim to inspire! Sometimes tho, I get annoyed reading some of these type of posts and my apologies if you do too. I mean how many times am I going to tell women that they are worth it? I think I might be at about 109 times right now! I struggled on what to write this week because this week and in recent weeks, I’ve been the one to actually need the inspiration. At times during the last few weeks I’ve felt discarded, rejected and simply worthless. I felt unworthy to inspire others, unworthy to give instruction/advice and unworthy to be what I know I am: DOPE! It was in this moment that I realized that there is always an audience for even the most repeated message. So for the 110th time:
YOU ARE WORTH IT!!
Am I? Yes you are!! You are worth whatever it is you are desiring in your heart and worth God’s very best! How do we get this message misconstrued? How do we go in the wrong direction, spiraling down a hole of doubt & despair? Oh I know – it’s those periods of time where we don’t feel our best and we’re in the ‘valley’. These valley times seem to trip us up because they trick us into believing that the valley is permanent! These times make us believe that U-turns are forbidden and that we will never get back on track and go in the right direction.
Here’s the good news – God will provide a redirect! Just like our GPS re-directs us when we’ve made a wrong turn, the Holy Spirit will do the same. The valley is temporary and it is this fact that solidifies this statement:
No matter where you are in your life’s journey, your worth as a woman never changes!
Y’all know Romans 8:28, “And we know that all things work together for good to those who love God, to those who are called according to His purpose”. In short: God works everything out for our good – the good He works out for our good – the bad He works out for our good – the ugly He works out for our good – everything!
So if you’re in the valley today, know that you’re still worth it and still deserving of God’s best!
On this journey, U-turns are permitted even if they’re in the middle of the street, intersection, or even the highway - wherever! God’s redirection is on the way!
"Every time I thought I was being rejected from something good. I was actually being re-directed to something better."
Wednesday, February 20, 2019
I’ve never understood exit interviews in the workplace. I mean, they’re so pointless because nobody will ever truly be honest in the interview, in efforts not to burn bridges. When asked, “Why are you deciding to move on?” no one is going to say to the HR person, “Well I’m moving on because this company sucks, the pay sucks and the people suck!” rather, people will usually give a more diplomatic answer like, “Although I’ve grown immensely from my time here, I was presented with a new opportunity where I’ll be able to take what I’ve learned here and apply it to the next phase of my career” or something like that. The HR Exit interviewer will never hear the real, true reason why someone leaves.
Well, I’ve discovered that exit interviews in relationships are the same way - a straight, real answer is never given. People will present to you a reason that they feel you want to hear or maybe one that they feel you can handle. When love exits stages left, you’ll rarely know the true reason why. This fact is something you have to be settled on and be able to move forward not knowing. It’s okay really because even though you may not know ‘why’ today, the future has a keen way of revealing the ‘why’ when it presents the next blessing! So at the end of the day, knowing why love exited isn’t really important.
When Love Shows Up, it shows up in grand fashion, pulling out all the stops! Then love accepts you for who you are at least in that moment of time. Love supports, love challenges, and just when you think love commits, love actually becomes withdrawn and unsure. Depending on the level of ‘fight’ love has within, will determine the next step. If the fight is there, then love will push, love will stand and love will persevere. If not, then, just like that - love exits stage left!
It’s been said that it’s better to have loved and lost than to have never loved at all. I agree! I thank love for the experience and for showing me what’s possible. I thank love for being honest about the lack of ‘fight’ within and for diplomacy in the exit interview. Although I may never know the real, true reason why, I’m still glad you were here, even if only for a little while.
When love exits stage left - God will start writing a new stage play with new plots, new scenes, and new characters!
Let the new story begin!
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